Self-recognition.

I'm hungry for a life lesson.

A big one.

My boss has been out of town for the past two weeks on vacation, leaving me her hectic workload on top of my already generally confusion. At first, I saw this as a great challenge, an opportunity for me to prove myself to her and the rest of my company.

But then I arrived on that first Monday, with my only reference point being a small list she had left me and my own brain. I panicked. I think I literally sat at my desk, silent, for a good ten minutes that morning before i even tackled my overflowing inbox. But shortly after, I realized I didn't have a choice. This was my responsibility, and hey, I'm sure my manager and co-workers will help push me, guide me and they'll definitely praise me.

The first week went by. No acknowledgement. No thank yous. Not even a check-in. My first thought? How could they possibly trust me with all this important work. Second? What am I doing all this work for if I won't even be recognized.

I was disappointed. Not only did I take on the challenge of doing my boss's job with minimal training and guidance, but I was doing what I thought was a fantastic job. I was building client relationships, getting the work done fast and getting it done well. And what did I have to show for it? Besides a checked-off to-do list, nothing.

But I didn't have a choice. I went into the second week with a more positive attitude. I was going to do the work for me and for me only, to have the satisfaction of knowing that I am just as capable as my boss to do this amount of work. And so I did.

That Monday, my boss's first day back after two weeks away, I went into work expecting very little. I was proud of what I had done and that was all that had mattered. But to my surprise, my boss not only praised what I had done as being a fantastic job at stepping up to the plate, but she brought me a scarf, specially picked out for me from Thailand. It was incredibly nice and thoughtful of her.

But all of a sudden, as much as I had wanted to hear those words of acknowledgement come from her mouth, I no longer needed them. I had proved to myself that I could do it, that I could do whatever was put in front of me. And I did.

So as much as praise from others is important and in many circumstances, necessary, that's not what got me through those two weeks. My own drive was my biggest motivation.

I'm hungry for...

WHAT: A big dinner salad after a full weekend of holiday (over)eating.

HOW: I simply bought all of my favorite salad ingredients at the grocery store, including a delicious dressing that will last me weeks when kept in the refrigerator.

INGREDIENTS: Romaine lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, corn, black olives, goat cheese, your favorite salad dressing and (oddly enough) a Morningstar Chick Patty, chopped and tossed into the salad to add protein and texture

WHY: I needed something healthy, but I didn't want to skimp on the flavor. The best way I've found to do this is to loud up on the fresh and healthy veggies and not hold back on whatever dressing you love. Not necessarily the fattiest, creamiest dressing in the grocery store, but something that will leave you satisfied with your meal.

TIP: Buy frozen corn and heat in a saute pan with just a spray of Pam. The corn will get a nice char flavor and color this way, and you can eat it year round, even out of season.

Some are silver and the others gold.

I'm hungry for nostalgia.

A good friend of mine from abroad had a scary thing happen to her and her family this past week. Her cousin, and her dear best friend, was left unconscious in a hospital in Israel after a scare with pneumonia. Back in America, my friend was left helpless and scared for her cousin, not knowing what her future would hold. Luckily, the cousin woke up and is currently recovering in the ICU of the Israeli hospital.

When I found out, I didn't hesitate for a second before contacting my friend. We've talked on and off for the past (almost) two years since we've been home from our abroad experience in London, but nothing too intense or serious that would warrant her confiding in me during a family emergency. But she did. Something about the connection that we made during our four months abroad stuck with both of us, even after not seeing each other for a year and a half.

When I got home from my studies, I knew somewhere inside of me that the magical friendships I had created throughout my abroad experience wouldn't last forever. And in some ways, this was true. We became instantly close, my friend and I, because we were in close quarters and, frankly, we were all each other had. That closeness couldn't last forever in a long distance friendship.

But it wasn't until recently and during this traumatic event that I realized just how good of a friend she is to me, how important she is. There are different types of friends: those who you've known your whole life, those who you've known for a shorter period but are your absolute best confidantes, and then those who are long distance, who you only talk to every so often.

But they're all friends, no matter when they came into your life or how long they stayed. My friend from London may not be my every day contact, but she is my friend, a very important friend, one that I cherish deeply. She's the friend that I go to so that I can reminisce about my time abroad, to escape my every day life, to get lost in memories that are simply things of the past. In some ways, she's the most special type of friend I have.

The saying goes 'make new friends but keep the old' and normally I would say, 'Who needs to make new friends?' But now, I'm happy to have them all.

Happy Thanksgiving

I am hungry for turkey.

And cranberries and stuffing and sweet potatoes and veggie casserole. And anything else that might be thrown onto the Thanksgiving buffet last minute. Literally, anything.

Thanksgiving is a huge holiday in my family. My mom and dad's side of the family, and then all of their relatives, all get together for holiday dinner, football, catching up and relaxing. We have a massive amount of food because, after all, there are more than 30 of us that end up gathering around the table. We eat, chat, and then fall into our yearly food comas around the TV.

This is the first year that I've really been thankful for my family. Yes, obviously every year I am thankful for them, for having them, being able to be a part of such an amazing group. But sitting, looking around at everyone, catching up with cousins that have moved away but came back for this dinner, it made me really appreciate everyone.

I was reminded of all good childhood memories. There are 13 cousins in all, and growing up, we were extremely close. We all eventually got older, got our own individual (and very different) personalities and naturally grew apart. But growing apart doesn't have to mean taking each other for granted. I am so lucky to have so much family that lives near me here in Chicago, family that I can rely on and call on when I need or want. Those same cousins that I used to play Barbies with or share birthday parties with can be the same cousins that become my confidantes as adults. Not for everything, but for family, I can always find something.

Thanksgiving truly is about family, and if at no other time, I am happy that I remembered that this holiday season.

But seasons change and so will I.

I'm hungry for winter.

It's an interesting concept, wanting the cold weather to come when warm weather is always more comfortable. But there's a different type of comfort in the cool, crisp air that winter brings. Many people say that winter brings gloominess, sorrow, general cold things and ideas. But when I think of winter, I think of Christmas, the beautiful city completely illuminated with holiday lights, spices filling the air on the streets, warm sweaters and tea, fresh fallen snow.

It's my first winter living in the city, and although all of the things listed above have been experiences of mine before, I have experienced none of them as an independent adult. They are all things that when living downtown, alone, part of the real world, I think I'll be able to appreciate that much more. The little things during the cold months are what make them not as cold as they might normally be.

My dad said that I needed a heavy winter coat, so when I refused, he went out and bought me an Alaskan-appropriate down parka, perfect for those walks to the bus in the morning. But when I'm walking toward the bus on these first few crisp mornings, it's not the brisk weather I notice; it's the beautiful lake in front of me as I walk towards Lake Shore Drive. The beauty of the lake, of my own walk on my way to work, completely masks the unpleasantness of the temperature.

So some might say that winter is the worst season, unbearable during the really dark months. But I say, bring it on, Chicago. For my first, beautiful, Chicago winter, it can't come soon enough.

Hungry for...

CRAVING: Clam Dip

INGREDIENTS: Canned, chopped clams, Knorr's Vegetable Soup Mix and plan, 2% Greek yogurt

FROM: In college, you're always looking for a snack food, something to eat non-stop while positioned permanently in front of the TV. My friend, Rachel Dickstein, has a family recipe that would always satisfy any craving. The dip is super easy and although she usually uses sour cream, it's just as delicious with the lighter Greek yogurt.

WHY: It's easy and delicious, and you can make it in advance for all of those cravings throughout the week.

Needless to say, I made a whole tub of it on Sunday and my roommate and I have practically devoured it already...

Let's get cooking.

I'm hungry to cook.

Kind of ironic, right? I started this blog to vent about my life and motivate myself to exercise my culinary skills.

But I haven't been cooking. I love to cook. In college, when I had a bad day, I would come home and force my roommates to let me do all the cooking for that night, to let me make something really delicious. (A really hard life they lived, huh?)

For whatever reason, being in the kitchen relaxes me. It's my outlet from the rest of the world, to create something so delicious and amazing that whatever else happened that day suddenly becomes irrelevant.

And I have to start this up again. My new goal is to cook three dinners every week, to make sure that I not only use my beautiful new kitchen with stainless steel appliances, but that I cook to make myself happy. Because when I'm in the kitchen, I know that I'll be happy.